The journey has been long and has taken many random roads to the resolution because I was more often than not, more interested in helping others rather than myself. …The corners of my mind held shadows that were never exposed to light. The shadows were never silent, constantly whispering, "Who are you?", "Why did you do that?", and "What makes you feel the way you feel?" What had happened to me in my past was all there hiding in the shadows, but I wouldn't or I couldn't expose it to light. Finally at the age of thirty-six, in 1981, I told almost everyone in the family the truth and sure enough it ripped the rafters from the roof. I was called a liar by most and many said that I had made the whole thing up. At this point in time when I had made the announcement that I had been a victim of incest with my brother and that I was Gay, was just too much for the family to handle. Prior to my announcement, my brother's wife had been murdered in 1979. Her body along with the body of her lover was found in a field outside the city where she lived and they had been missing for three weeks.